OOPS!

I forgot to mention that The Owners Volume IV :A New Epoch will be free to download over the next few days. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity so don't miss out!

Happy Reading!

If there is one out there he will find me...

Did I ever tell you what an attraction I hold for nutters? No? Well I'll let you in on the secret now shall I? Nutters love me. They simply adore me. I swear that to them I have a neon sign above my head, which proclaims in big glowing capital letters "THIS WOMAN WILL LISTEN POLITELY TO ALL YOUR VERBAL RUBBISH!"

Whenever they see me they head straight for me like a heat-seeking missile and I know I am done for. My latest nutter ambush came yesterday as I was minding my own business in the local park. I had sat down on a bench, dogs at my side and was reading the newspaper whilst my children played on the apparatus.

A man appeared from nowhere in front of me and began to fuss my dogs. Now this is not as rare an occurrence as it might seem since I have a Rottweiler [people either love or loathe them] and his initial conversation  did not ignite my fight or flight response. He did not look insane or like he was homeless and nor did he give off any pungent aroma. But he was a nutter alright and one of the most scary types...the ones who appear normal up until they say something so out-there, so extreme, that they made the hair on the nape of your neck stand up in fright.

Apropos of nothing he asked me if I could see a natural cloud in the sky. As yesterday was a lovely day I agreed there were no clouds to be seen, only to be informed that there have been NO natural clouds for the last 150 years and that what looked like clouds were actual poison gasses put there by the six major banks in the world.

I nodded politely whilst trying to look for a means of escape. It was at that point he went on to drone on about all his conspiracy theories and the "proof" behind them [one was that all of our DNA was stored in little vials in the Vatican] and I kept looking for my way out.

You see that is the main problem with these nutters - you can be in  a crowded place when they approach but somehow they single you from the crowd and they have such an insidious manner that you feel threatened and intimidated without them overtly doing anything other than talk. You can be surrounded by people, as in fact I was and no one would even realise there was anything wrong until it was too late.

In fairness he didn't attack me or say anything to make me think that was likely but I fear it is a question of time before his feeling of paranoia brought on by these extreme theories  cause him to attack someone. And that someone will probably never see it coming.

I am all for care in the community but with that comes  a responsibility for the authorities to ensure that medication and recommendations are adhered to. There is enough random killings in the world without us burying our heads on the sand and leaving such people to their own devices.

But perhaps you think I am making too much of this? Well walk a little way in my shoes and the next time someone comes up and tells you that the world is controlled by three key cities and that most of the people you see around you are drones, set in place by a few ruling families to spy on you and keep you in the dark...see how you feel?

Come to mention it though, sounds like a brilliant idea for a sci-fi book...

Happy reading folks!

This was my horoscope this morning:-




Today is the first day of the rest of your life. And so, of course, is tomorrow. As was yesterday. That's the thing about today. But here's what I can tell you about this particular today. It carries an astrological seal of approval that makes this particular truism exceptionally apt for all who share your sign. The Grand Cross formation of four heavenly bodies including Mars and Pluto in Cardinal signs makes this far more than any old ordinary 'first day of the rest of your life.' You will see what I mean by this soon enough! This week's Lunar Eclipse and 'Grand Cross' together is the most significant astrological influence for some time. Anything and everything positive can happen.


Sounds good doesn't it? Now perhaps I should tell you what I have been up to...


I am well into the first week of the Easter holidays and up until now the weather had been unseasonably warm.


As the weather has changed back to dull and gloomy, today I have been doing a fair bit of spring cleaning [I know- yuk!] and under piles of dirty clothing, bits of torn paper, broken toys and other paraphernalia I found a mouldy half-eaten ham sandwich in my nine year old's bedroom and various empty chocolate bar wrappers in my eleven year old's room. It was at that point I decided not to venture into the fourteen year old's room!


I have also been informed that if I don't get a new aerial within the next few weeks the big 60 inch tv will begin to fail due to lack of power from the aerial and pixilation problems.


I still can't work the new laptop and my guttering is growing a more profuse display of plants and flowers than the garden! The fence between myself and my neighbour is on the verge of a nervous breakdown and I have melted [yes melted] a corner of my kitchen cupboard by stupidly siting the toaster underneath it.


So if this is truly the first day of the rest of my life then God help me! Please, please, please can I turn back the clock to the old life?  ;)


Normal service will be resumed after the Easter hols when I can get back to editing Split Decision and writing my next up-and-coming novel.


Until then - Happy Reading!

And now I present the wonderful Mr Hugh Grant.

Today I had to contact Hugh Grant as I have used his name in my newest book. Here is a little snippet for your delectation:-

 “You know who he is? Your father?” Josh asked stupidly, as if he had not been following the conversation. “So who is he?”

Lucas took a huge breath before he let loose this momentous piece of information. “He’s Hugh Grant!”

“What?” Josh snorted as if the idea was preposterous.


“She went to London for a few weekends before I was born. She’s never talked much about them and when I ask she goes quiet, just like she does when I ask about my dad. She loves movies, especially ones with Huge Grant in them.”


Lucas stopped talking long enough to examine himself in the long mirror attached to the wardrobe door. Did he look like Hugh Grant? He had the same dark hair and general build but his face was rounder than the actor’s and had none of his fine bone structure. Then again everyone said he looked quite like his mum so that was no indication one way or another.


“None of that means anything…” Josh began.


Lucas interrupted. Josh was merely jealous because up until now he had had the upper hand since his father was a famous stunt man in Hollywood. But Hugh Grant had topped that. Hugh Grant could top anything. He was the scissors that cut the paper in Scissors, Paper, Rock and the paper that covered the rock in the same game. Hugh Grant was everything. And he was his father!






If he gets back to me and asks to be removed then I will have to do so...until then...


Happy reading.

I'm surprised to see you in here!

Well a character has popped up in my new book that I didn't expect. Her name is Valerie and she is very like my late grandmother.


I didn't intend to base this character on my grandmother at all - in fact I had her down for a very different personality type altogether but every time she spoke or performed any action, I saw and heard my grandmother in my head.


Sometimes this happens and when it does I always go with the feeling. I think it happens for a reason but whatever that is, it is so deeply buried in my subconscious, I cannot get to it.


So it looks like Valerie will be a larger character than I had originally anticipated. Just like my grandmother, she cannot let a good gossip pass her by.


Lets hope she is just as wise and just as endearing!

Am I normal at all?

Today I should be editing Split Decisions but instead I am writing a chapter from another book. I have workmen digging up my drive as I am having a new one laid and between making tea for them and stopping the dog barking, I can't concentrate enough to edit.


And yet I can write - it seems the noise does not hinder the writing process, only the editing. How weird is that? I guess that does go to prove that my writing comes from so far down inside of me it is not really a conscious thing, whereas the editing is.


One day I am going to investigate this further...but I guess it can wait until the drive is done! :)

HOT GOSSIP!

Lunch with friends and a gossip today...well a girl has to get inspiration for her new books from somewhere!


Ok so that's not strictly true. I don't use the nuggets of gossip or pieces of information that is gathered about friends' lives in such a direct way but I guess I do glean things from them.


Every piece of gossip that is dissected over the pub table is analysed - not just for my own reaction but for the reaction of others to it and it is that which I tend to use in my books.


For me, the greatest turn-off in a book is when a character seems cardboard, when they don't react in a way that is natural to them. And by that I don't mean react to the situation in the same way that I might but rather react in the exact way that he or she should, with his or her own personality traits, background and history.


So listening to friends coo and gasp, interject and explain is a fascinating experience for me and one which cannot fail to provide a deeper understanding into the psychology of human nature.


Or at least that's what I am telling myself as this week, very little editing is being done and a whole lots of socialising is taking place instead.


But hey its research isn't it? And anyway who's round is it now?


:) Happy reading!

This way up ^

Today I am happy and not even the rain which bounces off the sodden earth in my back garden can dampen my mood.


I am currently working on another edit of Split Decisions. As I have stated before, it's a very different book to The Owners and as such, I have kept it mostly under wraps. But the part I have just been working on is neither controversial nor contentious and I thought you just might like a little snippet, so here it is:-

I swallowed the lump which sat uncomfortably in my throat. I was not a bitch, not the sort of girl who sniggered behind another’s back at their stupidity and misfortune. I knew that about myself but it was suddenly not enough – I needed Suzie to know it too.

“It’s not about you, Suzie,” I said quietly, searching for the right words to say and unable to find them. Tongue-tied and embarrassed I realised how the sniggering must have been perceived. I tried to explain. “I was…I mean we were laughing at me, not…anything else.” I had been about to say ‘you’ rather than ‘anything else’ and managed to stop myself just in the nick of time. But even though it was the truth it was a lame excuse.  And we both knew it.

I have loved writing this book every bit as much as I loved writing The Owners but it has been nice to have a departure from sci-fi for a change.

By the middle of April I will be moving on to another book, one which is forming in the back of my mind at the moment, awaiting its chance to leap onto the pristine white screen as I type it out.

In the meantime - happy reading.

Which way is up?

I wrote yesterday about my feelings and I hope you were not troubled in reading them.Because I worried that I might have upset you with my vague uneasiness about the future.


So with that in mind, I discussed it with a group of friends and I made a startling discovery...they all felt pretty similar to how I felt. And yet each and every one of them was in the complete opposite of my own personal situation.


Here was a group of women who also feared what the future held...who also felt that their lives were lacking in some way. And I got to wondering whether this was endemic in our society or whether it was just testament to the old saying of 'misery loves company'.


But the truth has got to be something deeper hasn't it? Religion or lack of it has no bearing on the discussion as some of the women were true believers and others strict atheists.


Finances seemed to have no bearing either as some of the women came from affluent households and others of more modest ones.


Nationality and the idea of culture that is born from this played no part, as I was born in Scotland, one of the women was Irish and the others English.


Finally educational status was no indicator either as levels ranged from University education to local comprehensive to village school. Some of the women went out to work, some did not.


Many years ago I remember reading something about how all of the above both singly and in combination can affect a person's potential to feel happy about life.  I believe the term was coined 'happiness quotient' although it was a long time ago and I may be mis-remembering it.


So what is wrong with us all...why this apathy and worry? Mid-life crisis? I think that is too glib an answer. I also think the truth lies much, much deeper and some of it does indeed stem from childhood.


We are taught from a young age that meeting someone and settling down with them is the ultimate goal. Its the sugar coated ending on the romantic comedy, the finale of many novels and films. But its not the end, in fact it is only the beginning. However it is a beginning that is perhaps more mundane than the lead up to it. It is the start of routines and seeing the same face sitting across from you every morning and having the same conversation time and time again.


I am no psychologist or anthropologist but I think that maybe it doesn't have to be that way. The happiest couples in my social circle have active hobbies which they do together and continue to learn from. They socialise regularly with other couples and they talk about their issues and problems with an honesty and forthrightness that allows them to be fully understood.


Talk might be cheap but it is also invaluable. Just make sure you mean what you say.

Early this morning I read a lot of philosophical sayings. There was a reason that I did this and it had nothing at all to do with one of my books or my writing. I won't bore you with the reason but I did want to share some thoughts with you.




I had thought that I was always an intrepid explorer sort of person. I thought I was the sort of woman who would have pioneered across America in the days of covered wagons and cart horses if I had lived in that age.


I had thought that if I had lived in any other age my metal would have been tested and found to be strong and true. But I have come to the sad conclusion that I have been somewhat delusional over this.


My original assumption was based on the fact that I left home at sixteen for a summer job which required me to live-in. Although I returned home in the autumn, I left home for good a bare eighteen months later at the age of eighteen.


I moved around a lot when I was younger, leaving Glasgow for London, London for Birmingham and Birmingham for Bromsgrove. I got bored of the same old scenery, the same old places, the same old faces and when I stayed in any one place it was not through choice but through necessity because I had ties that bound me there.


More recently I longed to move, to seek new horizons, to embrace what the world had to offer. That said it would have been within the geographical confines of driving distance to the schools my children attend, so granted I was never about to backpack around the world!


But I find now that the future has the distinct shape and pattern of the past, the same hue and colour and holds no more promise for me than my chameleon past.


This is not about my writing or my children...these are things that I hold dearly to my heart and always will...this is about my personal journey through life as a single woman, a wife, a mother, a divorcee and finally back to a single woman again. It is about me alone.


I know exactly why I feel as I do and I know exactly what to do about it. I also know that it is in keeping with the next book I am about to embark on. Perhaps that is the whole point of me feeling this way? Perhaps it is a vehicle in which to enter the mind of my next main character? Perhaps. Or perhaps I should just stop analysing it and get on with things...


So no more procrastination...here goes...wheee...!

I conducted a second book signing and book talk/reading last night at Bleakhouse Library and had a wonderful time yet again.


It's always lovely to speak to a receptive audience and the folk who turned out to see me last night were both welcoming and interesting. I talked about my series of books The Owners and also about my novel Split Decisions, which is just starting on the editing process. In return I was asked lots of questions about the development of the plot within The Owners and my writing in general.


But what struck me most was how enthusiastic the audience were. As a writer it is easy to get caught up with the characters and plots of your own fabrication but it is quite another to see it in a reader.


I hope that the audience enjoyed it as much as I did!


I am returning to Bleakhouse on the 4th of April as I have been invited to deliver a prize to a winner of a school/library literacy competition. Again I will be talking about writing and available for book signings.


How I love my job! :)

Help! I'm in trouble!

Do you remember my blog about helping out in a friend's office whilst the secretary was away on a cruise? If not scroll back a little...


Anyway she is back now and not too happy with me!


The office is situated at the back of a factory. My dad used to work in a factory. My mum used to work in a factory and even ex-boyfriends of mine have worked in factories, so I don't hark from a blinkered existence.


I understand the high jinks that go on there, the banter and camaraderie and I also understand that there is a level of pornography that is acceptable within the confines of the actual factory unit.


However I did not expect to be sitting at a desk with a large calendar of a naked woman at my back, especially since this was a female dominated office!


The said naked female was beautiful and the image was artfully composed, lit in subtle tones of granite and light grey...but hey in my eyes a woman with no kit on is still a woman with no kit on.


Short of being a woman who actually enjoys another naked female [which I'm not] I really didn't want to be confronted with another woman's breasts every time I reached for the phone.


But I didn't want to just remove the calendar as it was not my place to do so. So I typexed a white bra and pants onto the lovely lady. even for me it was a good rendition. That white correction fluid makes a lovey lacey look over photographic paper I discovered.


To my eyes it was a compromise. Lovely lady stayed up on the wall in her artful pose and I didn't have to keep seeing her bits.


Ah but not so when the real secretary arrived back. Turns out that the calendar was given to her by her husband and came from his factory. She is livid!


Ok I get that it wasn't mine to deface but I have to ask myself why a lady would want such a thing up behind her, especially when the lady is almost at retirement age and in no way resembles the image herself.


So I am in the dog house! ;)


But I have only one thing to say. NOT sorry!


Maybe if the country was a bit more modest in general and we were not confronted with semi-pornographic images at every turn our culture would not be deteriorating the way it is...


Think on it a bit, why don't you?


x

Scheduled Book Signing and Talks for the next few weeks.


You will find me in the following places over the next few weeks.


March 25th Bleakhouse Library.
March 26th Dudley Library.
April 4th Bleakhouse Library [school event]
April 23rd daytime Droitwich Library
April 23rd evening Bromsgrove Library
April 25th Halesowen Library event.


I will be talking about my popular series The Owners and selling signed copies.


I will also be revealing insights into my newest book which is still in progress, entitled Split Decision.


Please contact the individual relevant library for times and directions.


I hope to see you there.


Carmen.

I SALUTE YOU!

Good morning! May I help you?


For the last two days I have been helping out in the office of a friend as the company's secretary has gone off on holiday [ a cruise I believe - lucky lady!]


And what a lark I have had...I got dressed up  in proper office attire, styled my hair and applied both perfume and makeup. I honestly looked like a different person - the kids almost didn't recognise me when I walked through the door!


But it's made me realise something. As a mom who is home all day writing, my kids NEVER have to fend for themselves. They don't put their dirty plates in the sink, they don't help out with chores and they wouldn't even be able to make a slice of toast for themselves if they had to.


Therefore these last two days have been an eye-opener for us all. Because I had to leave home before the kids, my eldest had to lock up and then let them all back in again at the end of the day. The kids learned to wait for their tea and accept that I was truly going as fast as I could.


Most importantly of all, in my opinion, they saw what other kids lives are like - and so did I. The constant organising at the start and end of the day to ensure that the house and its occupants ran smoothly whilst I was out working...and the sense of having to pull together to achieve the best end result for all.


The lists of instructions to make sure the lights were off, the doors locked etc...


The walking of dogs at 7am so that they were not neglected....


The cooking of the evening meal in high heels and a tight skirt because the kids would have expired if I had taken five minutes out to change...


These were all things that were strange for me and yet familiar to many other women worldwide I am sure.


So Ladies [and Gentlemen as I am aware some of you men hold down this demanding home/work balance] I take my hat off to you!


For all the times you went without milk in your morning coffee because to have used it meant there would be none for the kids cornflakes...


For the legions of you who slam the dinner in the oven, still wearing your business clothes of the day...


For those of you who perform a whirling dervish of spins with every activity, holding so many balls in the air at once that if they fell, the weight of them descending on you would crush you into the asphalt beneath your feet...


I salute you!


Because fun as this was, it was also exhausting and draining. So tomorrow I'll be back in my jeans and t-shirt and back to my beloved writing! See you there!


Carmen x

GLAD TIDINGS!


Good news! Volume IV is now showing as available on Amazon as an ebook [the paperbacks apparently take up to a month to show up - I have no idea why] and is priced at £2.00.


My other good news is that sales figures have just come in for Volume II and Volume III. Sales show that people who have bought and read Vol I are coming back for the follow on volumes, so happy reading all round!


As a writer its so lovely to know that you are enjoying the tales, journeying through the intertwined lives of the characters and empathising with them.


I think that is the real beauty of a good read...we all want to get lost in it but we want to find ourselves through it too and I hope that my stories provide at least some measure of that.


I will be at the wonderful Bleakhouse Library, [0121 422 2798]West Midlands, giving a talk on writing and my books on March 25th. The staff at the library are also taking pre-orders of signed copies of Volume III and will be happy to take your booking.


I visited this library about eighteen months ago when my first novel was published and the staff and customers are an exceptionally friendly bunch so do pop along.


I look forward to meeting you.

Update as promised!


The Owners
The Owners Volume IV should be appearing on Amazon at any moment and I thank you for your patience. It has been a long haul and although the writing of this particular volume progressed very nicely, there has been one hitch after another in getting it to press.


The Decision.
As you may remember, this was a story I began long, long ago [probably about 6 or seven years ago] and had to abandon for various reasons.


I came back to it recently with the intention of finishing it off and giving myself a break from The Owners series.


It wasn't hard to get back into the characters or to visualise where they were going and how they felt about it but what was almost impossible to do, was recreate the way in which I told the story.


You see I have changed! Yes this has become a big revelation to me. The chapters I wrote all those years ago have had to be changed, moulded to fit my newly emerged style.


It wasn't that they were badly written to begin with - indeed far from it but my writing is now stronger, more gritty with a hardened edge and I can only credit this to the success of The Owners.


Where once before I looked in from outside at the characters in The Decision, now I am submerged in the very core of them. Consequently they have more depth, feeling and colour than ever before.


At first I thought that I was imagining this, however even my proof readers have remarked upon it, so I realise that it must be true. I wonder if this means I have finally grown up. I suspect not. I think it merely means that I have achieved a level of introspection that I could or would not attain before...


I hope The Decision will be out in the summer. Until then I will keep you informed of developments.

Forget what I said earlier about staying put...I desperately want to move!


You know I can almost see the men amongst you raising your eyebrows at my about-turn but the truth is that the heart wants what it wants...and mine desperately needs to move.


I have seen a house that I have irrevocably fallen in love with. It is a house with soul and a beating heart and it calls my name every time I pass it. You can think me crazy if you wish but this house is calling to me, pulling me in and nurturing me with images of how my life could be if only I could call this particular place home...


And I am listening with heart as well as ears, with a breathless anticipation of what could be if fate and fortune really do favour the brave and the earnest.


The neighbours to this property are lovely and there is a good feeling to the place...its like coming home after a long absence when no-one berates you for how long you have been gone or how distant you have had to be.


It just feels right.


I am a great believer in gut instinct. But even more than that, I believe in listening to my heart.


And my heart is shouting out this house's address.


Wish me luck readers - I hope I am about to embark on a whole new chapter!

COMING SOON!

I am always itching to get back to writing after any holiday and this half term is no exception.


I have never been one of those writers who sit staring at a wall for long stretches of time. But sometimes I wonder if the sense of achievement they feel at the conclusion of a book is greater than mine. Is it all the more satisfying to metaphorically lay their pen down after a hard and ferocious struggle to compose their thoughts into words? Or do they feel exactly the same as I do?


The reason that this is on my mind is twofold. Firstly, the fourth Volume of The Owners will be released imminently. And secondly - when the kids do go back to school I have to write the ending to The Decision and then begin the long editing process [and this one requires an extensive edit] but it is the final home stretch.


The finessing of a work is not as difficult as visualising the concept in the first place or transposing those thoughts and ideas into words that other people can relate to...it is merely the gloss put on afterwards.


And when it is finished? What will I feel?


There is a strange sadness that accompanies the ending of any book. The author has to say goodbye and good luck to the characters and like a mother, stand back and watch them rise to the surface or fall flat on their face.


And there is a heartbreak in there too.


But most of all, like a fickle lover, there is a desire to move on to the next book, the next concept, the next set of new characters...


I'll keep you informed of my progress.  :)

A snippet from my latest book The decision.


This book is very different to The Owners series both in content and in writing style. In particular it will appeal to fans of Stephenie Meyer, as it has a strong love interest theme which blends and interacts with the plotline. Here is a little taster:-


“Oh!” I was unaccountably sad, as though he was leaving me already. I had no hold over him, no right to ask him to stay and yet I felt crushed at the thought that he was prepared to leave me at some future date.  


Funnily enough, I started this book years ago but had to abandon it to pursue something else. Only now that I have come back to it can I see so much more clearly where the story is going. It is hard hitting and reflects the world we live in today...not an easy thing to do in many ways.


I will keep you posted as to how it's getting on.


In the meantime I hope that The Owners Volume IV will be out in less than two weeks! Exciting times!