Apologies are required I believe.

To all the other Ceroc dancers at the venue I attended last night, I have this to say : 'please accept my sincere apologies'.

Now I know that you are wondering what I did that was so awful I feel I have to offer a public apology, so I will tell you. But first I have to set the scene a little, so bear with me.

Imagine if you will, a smallish, very flat-footed woman who has low blood pressure which gives her a tendency to dizzy spells. Got that image? Good!

Now dress her in a flowing skirt and top and slide her feet into a pair of neck-breakingly high heels and there I am.

Having previously attended many Ceroc sessions in the past, I had somehow managed to convince myself that even though I had not been to a lesson in over a year, I would magically remember everything, every move, every dip and every signal.

More than that...somewhere in my befudddled brain I had managed to convince myself that in my absence I would still somehow have managed to absorb all the lessons I had missed, as if by turning up on one night, I could suddenly do every step perfectly, having gleaned it almost by osmosis from the dance teacher.

I was wrong. Oh boy was I wrong. I catapulted myself around the room, much to the initial amusement of most of the other dancers. Spinning like a drunken whirling dervish I collided with more than one other dancer, unable to spin on the spot as I had intended. Strangely, their amusement soon wore off.

But worse was to come...on executing a particularly difficult turn, I found the heel of my shoe firmly imbedded in the calf muscle of another lady dancer...and on trying to extricate it, I think I may have sliced rather a lot of skin from her leg.

There was a howl and possibly some blood [thankfully it was too dark to really see but there could not have been much, or we would all have been sliding around in it on the dance floor].

I apologised profusely at the time but the damage was done. I guess the fact that I did not remove myself from the premises immediately, only added salt to the wound, so to speak!

So here it is...people of Ceroc Bromsgrove, I apologise unreservedly.

But unfortunately for you, I had a great time and will certainly be back...

P.S. I was in town today and noticed that the price of football shin-pads had rocketed. Apparently, due to the business law of supply and demand, local demand has risen exponentially and prices have sky-rocketed...

Now there couldn't possibly be a connection there...or could there?

So be warned - I could be heading for a Ceroc venue near you! Get those old shin-pads dusted off! ;)

My Big Night Out

Now forgive me if this sounds strange to you but I have always hankered after the life I could have had if I had lived abroad...warm beaches, soft balmy evenings, days spent by the pool and nights out enjoying myself with my family.

And then yesterday, we got that life.

For one day only, I was rewarded with my dream. The sun shone in the sky, as the children and I looked around some market stalls in the morning, before going swimming in the afternoon. [Ok so the pool was indoors in a leisure complex but I'm not going to look a gift horse in the mouth or pick at details!]

After that we had a nice tea and a little siesta before getting ready and heading out to...a local social club [ta-da!] for a spot of entertainment.

I had never been to this particular place before but was very impressed, not least by the warm and friendly atmosphere and the amount of families with other children present.

More to the point, my own children were animated, chatting and laughing and completely fine about missing the electrical equipment they are so often connected to [playstations, ds consoles, tvs and dvds].

We had a fantastic time. The drink prices were not overinflated, the kids had crisps and squash and I had a solitary glass of wine ...and we danced and had fun. So much so, that I almost had to drag my daughter off the dance floor, where she was insisting that I teach her some Ceroc moves [much to the amusement of my son].

The entertainment was reasonable [the song list was a little dated perhaps but certainly danceable to] and the venue clean and roomy.

But all this is missing the point. It gave me something that I thought only the lure of overseas could ever provide...it gave me my children, fully engaging in doing things together as a family, without worrying who was watching us makes fools of ourselves.

As my Grandmother used to say "you are a long time dead!" She was right. We all get so caught up in the mundane elements of life, the chores that have to be done, the endless lists of things waiting to be attended to...

Well I have made an executive decision now. Those lists can wait just a little longer...and if a couple more things get added in the process, so be it.

Life is for the living. x

The Owners Volume V

As I am almost finished editing the Owners Volume IV, I am aware that my thoughts are shifting towards Volume V.

Changes are afoot - they are the noises carried by the wind, the strange and unusual scents pervading the air everywhere I go and the sights which fill my inner vision with wonder and excitement.

I can't wait to introduce you all to the characters, some known and familiar, others new and unknown...who are waiting to fill your minds and hearts with their stories.

Come on a voyage of discovery with me - I promise you will never look at things in quite the same way, ever again.

The Owners Volume IV : A New Epoch  - out soon.

A Two-Way Mirror in a Bathroom???

I have just seen reports of a two -way mirror in a ladies toilet in  a club in Glasgow, which my friend put on facebook.

Really?? I mean really? Come on guys how weird is that? If the only way you can get your kicks is by watching some unsuspecting woman reapplying her make-up, or adjusting her hair, then I feel very sorry for you...

And as for the billionaire club owner who termed it "a bit of fun", let's think how he would like it if we all got a sneaky-peek at his most prized possession - his bank details. Not a lot I would imagine!

I would love to think that men would shun these private rooms where the images behind the mirrors can be seen but a good knowledge of human nature, suggests that there will always be punters ready to part with their cash, for the deviant thrill this will provide.

Britain - you are getting sleazier by the minute and I for one am ashamed.

Pigeon Pie!

I forgot to tell you how the pigeon was getting on. This is the wood pigeon that my daughter and I rescued from her school playground, after it had been attacked by a cat or a fox [or maybe a small ferocious child -I've seen the kids at that school!!!]

Anyway, the pigeon had lost a lot of blood and feathers and its one wing tip was torn off. It also had wounds around its neck and on its chest but with a lot of love and attention, these have healed and its flight feathers are finally growing back now.

Sophia insisted on calling it Fluffy - the most ridiculous name for a pigeon, I know but that's kids for you. It started off its recovery in our conservatory but as the days have warmed up, it has been moved out of there, lest it end up as a rather unfortunate pigeon pie...

I let it out when I have to clean its cage and it walks around having a look at everything, then when I am ready, it hops back in as if the cage is the best home its ever known and maybe indeed it is!

The dogs don't bother about it and it has learned to ignore them too so at least that's a blessing!

But in about three weeks I think it will be ready to be returned to the wild. I have spoken to the school and they are happy to have the children in the playground whilst we release it and it flies off to wherever pigeons fly off to.

Perhaps if it is true about karma then it will make up for the time I had to pluck what remained of a pigeon out of the radiator grill of a car I was in...remember peeps - what goes around comes around...

It's a new day!

Its a new day and I want to be singing that Michael Buble song that goes "it's a new day, it's a new dawn, it's a new life for-o-or meeee and I'm feelin' fine" or at least failing that, "it's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling..."

Because...wait for it...wait for it...I have just finished the first whole edit of The Owners, Volume IV : A New Epoch.

Not only that but I have baked a delicious chocolate fudge cake in celebration. Ok, the cake wasn't quite to celebrate the edit but what the hell - in for a penny, in for a pound.


Last night I went to pick up my courtesy car [my own car has now been taken for repair]. Since the only two cars available to me were a large Kia  which was an automatic and therefore completely unsuitable and the other was a VW Golf, I ended up with the Golf.

Let me tell you that my eyes have been firmly opened! After years [ok decades actually] of protesting that a car is a car and is only useful to get from A to B, I have been converted into one of these people who cannot be torn from the driving seat.

This car [apologies to my own humble Citroen Berlingo] does everything but make a packed lunch for you. DAB radio, CD player [my car still has only radio/cassette player], a loud beeping when you are reversing and a digital picture of what you are about to back into. WOW.

Thus I found myself, having completed the first edit today, managing to convince myself that I REALLY did need to pop to the shops just to get that packet of icing sugar, so that I could bake a cake. [Talk about self-deception!]

So I did the shopping and I baked my cake and all because I fancied a ride out in the courtesy car! If I didn't know better I would think I had been possessed by aliens...oh, must end this blog now...it seems we have run out of mackerel pate...guess I'll just have to pop to the shops to fetch some more then, darn it! ;)

This was supposed to be my big editing week, however life has stepped in and changed my plans somewhat.

On Sunday I was involved in a road accident in which the entire back of my car was caved in. Since I had a passenger with me and all three of my children and two dogs, I'm more concerned that we are all alive, than with the damage to the car.

However as the damage was considerable and one of the children had chest pains and had to be taken to hospital the next day, things have become rather fraught. Add into that the fact that I have sustained a neck injury which makes me feel as if my head is about to roll clean off my shoulders at any minute and that my car has gone into the garage for repairs and that I am still awaiting the delivery of a courtesy car, you will excuse me from the editing, I think.

I will let you know how things go but hopefully I will soon be back on track!

Take a peek on Amazon!

Don't forget that you can type my name into the Amazon search engine and you will be able to read some reviews of my books, as well as sample the first couple of chapters.

Go on, take a peek. You know you want to ;) x

 

Synopsis for Volume IV : A New Epoch

 I wrote this last night. I may still make some changes to it before publication but this is generally how the synopsis for the fourth volume will read.

Holding on tenaciously in an ever changing situation, Seth knows that their battle for survival is far from won. With few true friends around him and many watchful eyes, he knows that one false step will lead to disaster.

None of this concerns John Stark. Consumed with a desire for revenge, which is tempered only by his divinely possessed qualities of benevolence and compassion, he has one aim in life, to hold his flock around him and keep them true.

The ultimate truth is something that Jack Ryan knows all about. It has been his  obsession and his nemesis in the past. His only hope now is that the truth will serve to set them free.

Georgia knows that the truth is not always as palatable as she would wish. Will these people choose the pain of truth or the comfort of lies? For all their sakes she hopes they will make the right decision.

Truth or lie? Truth or lie?

What truths are about to be uncovered and how will it affect this weary band of travellers in the fourth volume of this gripping series?

The Owners Volume IV : A New Epoch.

I am hoping that Volume IV will be out in the summer [the real summer, not the on/off/on/off , two minutes of sporadic sunshine that we are being favoured with at the moment] but I'm afraid that the editing process is having to currently take second place to everything else that is going on at the moment.

But I promise that as soon as the editing is done, I will be onto Volume V. To be honest, it's not an actual choice. In order to stop the characters clamouring for attention in my head, I have to write down what they want to say and do...

Let's just say that whatever the outside world throws at me, it's got internal competition for attention. I'll let you guess which one usually wins!

My holiday in Brean.

Now I did tell you a few weeks ago, that I had just come back from holiday and that I would tell you all about it, so here it is.

Before I start, let me just explain one thing...I am a bit of a nervous home leaver. Not a nervous flyer, or even traveller but an actual person who is nervous of leaving home.

Not that I am agoraphobic - I have no fear of open spaces - it's more that I am terminally nervous of being away from all my belongings. So much so, that once, as a child, I packed my entire Enid Blyton book collection, plus a few other authors' works into the bottom of my poor unsuspecting dad's suitcase. You can imagine his horror upon opening it, to find that he had not in fact packed too many clothes but that the case was instead filled with my books.

Since we had walked the ten minutes journey from the train station to our rental holiday home [with of course him carrying the suitcase as this was prior to wheeled suitcases becoming the norm,] he wasn't best pleased. However, I digress slightly...

Let's suffice it to say, that I am utterly convinced, that if there is such a thing as reincarnation, I was a snail in a former life, carrying my home around with me.

I have a tendancy therefore to take everything I could possibly need [and lots of things I couldn't possibly use] with me on my travels. The checklist alone is enough to require the felling of several trees worth of paper! But on reflection, it makes for interesting reading!

So there we were, me, the kids and our two dogs, sandwiched into the car with enough clothing, food, towels and a whole host of other irrelevant stuff, to last the length of at least one world war. [Because of course there would not be a nearby supermarket which would sell any food that I found remotely recognisable, what with this being a different county to the one in which we live - except that there was].

And there would not be anywhere I could purchase a bottle of wine,[other than the on-site shop and any number of other places locally which sold alcohol.]

Nor could there possibly be anywhere that sold chocolate, thus requiring me to take not one, or even two, but three bars of chocolate...

I could go on but I think you get the picture!

Armed as I was with my mountain of food, the kids could have been forgiven for thinking that we were going on a trek to the end of the world! And what did I find when I arrived? A caravan that exactly fitted our requirements, heaters put on ready for our arrival and everything neat and tidy.

Well laid out, the caravan was fitted with everything we could have needed and was a real home from home, so much so,that I would have no hesitation in recommending it to anyone visiting the area.


In fact, I fully intend to return in the near future. But this time I will be packing less for the journey. Even a snail like me can learn something...

P.S. should you want to contact the owners of the caravan I stayed in, you can call them on  07944445556 and ask for Brian or Tina from Finishing Touches.

Russia, Germany, France and everywhere else!

Now I have mentioned this before but I am aware that this blog is read widely in Russia and many other foreign countries.

What I want to know from you please, is whether you are reading it in English or as translated into your own language?

I ask because if you are translating it, there may be bits which do not translate well and if that is the case, I will try to bear it in mind for future posts, so please let me know at carmen.capuano@ymail.com.

Remember too that you can log onto http://carmencapuano.getfreehosting.co.uk to view mywebsite!

Monday...

Well despite a late start, one of the dogs getting into a barking frenzy over the fact that the doorbell keeps ringing and there is no one there and several friends sending me long and laborious texts, I have managed to edit, expand and refine the first two chapters of Volume IV, so I'm feeling rather pleased with myself...let's see how long I can keep that feeling, as the week progresses!

I'll let you know how I get on.

P.S. I'm in talks at the moment with Blackheath library reading group to establish when I will be popping over to chat to them.

If you belong to another library/reading group, feel free to ask me to come pay a visit. I promise you will learn something!

25/04/13


“I know how this must feel…like we are running away. And I sure ain’t never been known for running away from trouble,” he paused a moment to look them both in the eye, needing them to understand that the words he spoke came from the heart.
“But there are some fights you just ain’t ever gonna win. And the skill is in being able to recognise them when they happen along.”

This is a little bit of the very last chapter of Volume IV. I will be sad to see it completely written as Volume V picks up not where Volume IV ended but over a decade later, when the situation is vastly altered...


12.35pm I have just written the very last words in the very last chapter and now I'm feeling both euphoric and sad at the same time. Never mind, I'll be starting the editing in the next few days, so I'll be able to get to know the characters all over again!

Too much far too soon.

I read something in the Huffington Post the other day which reflected exactly how I felt.

Apparently a father of a young daughter, who just also happened to be a Reverend, wrote an open letter to  a well-known underwear brand, asking that they reconsider their plans to produce and sell lacy, slogan emblazoned underwear to young(ish) children.

Now I use the word children here both carefully and well considered.

By the laws of this country and most other progressive ones, minors are considered to be 'children' until at least the age of sixteen if not much older. This means that certain things, acts and products are prohibited to them. And this is done with good reason.

Now I know we all love our children and want them to be happy, stylish and feel that they fit in with their peers...but let's get real here...

Do you really think that emblazoning a pair of lacy, racy thong pants with the slogan "feeling lucky?" is the way to do it? Or allowing our teens to be wearing such things?

No! The sentiments exposed there are both too jocular by nature with a semi-sophisticated self-deprication and at once too mocking to emulate the true way that teens feel about the very idea of sexual attraction.

Think back to your own early teens if you will. Were you really so sure of your own attractiveness that you could wear these pants with no self-effacement, no modesty? If you are truthful, I think you will agree with me that the answer is no.

These slogans are made up by [and any teens reading this, I want you to take note] fat, balding old men who sit behind desks dreaming lasciviously of young girls.

Be in no doubt about that.

And girls, these pants are not grown up, they are not sexy...they were designed by dirty old men who dream of you wearing them. Please, please do not buy them!

And mothers and fathers out there - please help your children to see what is happening. We still live in a world where men like Garry Glitter and Jimmy Saville are reviled - do not let that ever change. This type of underwear is designed to pander to that very element of society...to take innocence and corrupt it as early as possible!

For all our sakes, get this mini-porn lingerie back where it belongs, on the cutting room floor.

Six degrees of separation.

I am working on the theory of six degrees of separation at the moment. Perhaps you have heard of it?

It is a concept that states that there may be as little as six people or links in any chain, which binds any one person to the most unlikeliest of other persons.

For example there may be someone who knows you, who has a cousin, who's best friends' husband has an uncle who is the florist of Elton John say...but I'm sure you get the idea.

It's way too late and I'm way too tired to be writing tonight but let me just say this...If you have a neice who has a best friend who has an uncle with a brother-in-law who works for Mr Big Movie Producer, could you please pass them a copy of my book! ;) I'd be ever so grateful.

She had slipped off her shoes and socks as they had begun to unload the food. Not really sure why, she had needed to feel the naturalness and warmth of the wood grain on her bare skin, as if it could undo all the unnaturalness of the past few hours, the revelations she had been forced to bear witness to.

Taken from The Owners, Volume IV out soon!

Still a handsome woman, her face was noticeably older than it had been the year before. In living through the turmoil and challenges of the last twelve months, Sally had aged a decade.

Georgia had lived side by side with her every day for this past year but hadn’t noticed until now, so the realisation came with the subtlety of a sledgehammer. Deep facial lines forced her features into sharp relief and dragged at Georgia’s heart.

Last chapter of The Owners Volume IV being written today.

The Owners Volume IV.

Somehow I can't quite believe that volume IV is almost completely written.

Don't get me wrong, I have spent countless hours slogging away at it and many more hours thinking about the route it was taking through the plot...and yet the almost completed work sits before me like a thing never seen before!

There is one more chapter to write and a lot of editing but by this stage, the promise of a finished book is so close, I can almost smell it.

Because a finished book is a strange thing indeed. I don't know about other authors but for me the book is almost a part of me whilst I am writing it; an extension of my own body if you like. But once written, it is like a child that has been firmly expelled from the birth canal - always linked to me but a seperate entity all of its own, expected to make its own way in the big wide world with only a gentle push from me to help it on its way.

If I wasn't so unsentimental I'd shed a tear ;)

Happy reading!  x

Boston attacks.

My sympathies to the victims and their families, of the Boston explosions yesterday. Nothing I or anyone else can say can alleviate your pain, or take away the horror of this indefensible act.

Such faceless violence is always sickening and incomprehensible. The world mourns your loss with you.